This Isn't a Bucket List

A lot of people have asked if this project is my "bucket list."  The answer is "no" and here's why.  I set off on this journey so-to-speak through inspiration from my friends.  Watching them do what they love and wondering in awe what they experience when in the moment of performing on stage.  As I get older and the things that matter most become crystal clear to me, I realize that the time is now to truly get to know my family and friends inside and out.  This list is more than a bucket list; an agenda of things to do before I die.  It is about more than simply checking something off and saying "I did that."  This project is about getting to know the person behind the thing because they are what matters to me.  YOU are the point of this list, not the things themselves.  More so than knowing you by your title of "sister" "mother" "father" "cousin" or "high school friend;" truly who you are as a person and what makes you tick-- that is what I am after! 

This past weekend at my brother's house, I learned more about my sister-in-law Laural in one hour than I have over the past few years.  That taught me something-- it is not time simply time spent in a room with someone, but what we do with our time spent with those we love, not taking those moments for granted, that truly matters.  What do we really know about the people around us?  Why aren't we asking questions anymore and engaging in meaningful conversation?  I thought of this a while back when I tried to explain to myself who my mother is.  Sure I know her as mom, but as I know now that I am a parent, she was someone before children.  Her children do not define who she is as a person (or didn't at least for 21 years of her life) what she likes and doesn't like, where she has been and what she has done.  What do I know about that person??  Why haven't I tried harder to find out? 

Over time, things crust over, memories harden, and perceptions become solid and defined and tend to remain stagnant despite those around us changing (ie- my high school friends aren't 15 anymore!)  We stop asking questions of those around us as to how they got where they are, why they are there and where they want to be.  It is their journey that defines them, and not their title in your life.  Part of their journey is their "thing"-- what they like to do, or what they do that is such a big part of their life, now or in the past.  I learned from Laural how she got where she is and why.  That is important to me and it is something I will not forget.  I hope to go through that with each person as I check these things off my list. 

Thank you, as always, for reading!